Thanksgiving

Another second ticks away,
Another minute ends.
I'm thankful for the time I have
and all the pain it mends.


I'm thankful for my loyal friends
And all the time we've shared.
I'm thankful for the times they say
"Of course we've always cared!"


I'm thankful for my little car
And the places I can go.
I'm thankful for the job I work
So I don't have to mow.


I'm thankful for my college years
No matter how dull they seem.
I'm thankful for my fun degree
And for my future team.


I'm thankful for so many things,
though far to much to list.
I'm thankful for my past ventures
Every one I'll surely miss.


Above all this I'm thankful for,
only one is truly pure:
I'm thankful for my God and King
The one whom I adore.


Happy Thanksgiving everyone.

Set It Off

I seem to be getting into a habit of posting late at night. I guess that works for me. /shrug

I've been thinking about what God wants from me, what direction he is leading me. I know that he wants me to be a part of ministry, but I don't know how to get there. I am currently going for game design, and I know I'd be damn good at it. Obviously, this sounds very proud, but I've realized something about myself: I am rather self defeating. Often times my biggest obstacle is my own self-consciousness, and I end up playing down my God given gifts. I am excellently suited to programming, as I have an extremely analytical outlook on life. I try to find logic in everything, and I am constantly questioning what I already know. I've said before that I have a head for useless facts, but I don't really think that anymore. I simply have a head for facts.

In the past few weeks, I have been finding who I am, and who I want to be. I want to be a role model, but right now I am weak. But maybe that is the biggest reason I want to lead. I am nothing, but with God, I know I can do all things. No one should follow me. Not a single person should ever model their life off of mine, but I earnestly hope and pray and chase after a single quality: That when someone sees me, they will see a broken vessel, whom God has returned to form and purposed for perfection. Who I was will never be more than nothing, but with God filling my heart, rushing through my veins with the purest ecstasy, I am more than a conquerer in Christ (I'm reading through Romans right now, if you hadn't guessed).

Life's too short, eh? Maybe I can try to life my life unto God. Everything will be better if I do, I have that knowledge in my mind. God, help me put to death my own self-consciousness and be the person I really am: A metal head, a technophile, a man with problems, and above all else, a man redeemed.

RISE! 
Let your spirit fly!
RISE!
Stand up for yourself!
RISE!
Hold your head up high!
Set It Off - P.O.D

thoughts

I don't really know why I decided to write tonight. It's nearly 12 and I honestly should be going to bed. So much has been happening that I have no really desire to talk about, at least not on such a public forum.

And yet, I do seem to be drawn to writing at this odd hour. For no decipherable rhyme or reason, I sit in from of my little screen in my little room as part of my little world.

It's a interesting concept, and one I have been thinking about for awhile. How often are we the center of our own little worlds? No really, step back for a second and think: how much do you do, every day, that is wholly and completely about you? Probably more that you think.

But in truth, we have no world, nor even our own space. No plot of land or deed of ownership. Rather, everything we have is lent to us. I forget that. A lot. I always say "my" money, "my" time, "my" car, "my" life. God I am a fool sometimes.

I have nothing that is not given to me. I have no claim to anything material or spiritual except through Christ. We know this to be true, every one of us in our own way, yet we deny it every day.

I have no desire to sleep right now. I have so much, and I have no idea what to use it for. Not only money, but intelligence and ability. I have talent that I don't use. I squander my time because I never have to try. I never fail because of any lack of ability, but always a lack of reason.

Is it worse to waste ability, or to never have it? I don't claim to know.

He is We

I can not recommend this band enough. Really, they are amazing. If you like good music, you need to go listen to this now.

http://heiswe.bandcamp.com/

Also, you can download all the songs there for free.

And if you can't make yourself find a song on the link, all you have to to do is watch this video for an awesome song! Then you can go click the link and download all the music. =)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gbo3LYv7V2c

Annoucement!

Hey! Hey you! Yeah, you! You should go check out my second blog!

Yes, I know what you're thinking: "Thomas, why in the world would you need a second blog? You hardly use this one!" Well, that's fair, but I have a good explination. Sorta. Honest!

Basically I want this blog to be a bit more private, mostly between my friends. My second blog is for youth group people as well, and I'm going to try to give it too a lot of people.

But what is this second blog? Well, that's a good question!

I have a hard time reading and studying the bible, so I've decided (with God's help....) that I need a goal to work towards. That goal is for me to read one chapter from the new testament per day, and then study it and post it on my blog! My hope is that I will get a lot out of getting into a schedule (I certainly will), and others will get something from my writing as well.

Without further ado, the address: http://onechaptereveryday.blogspot.com/ (spiffy, right?)

Now! My final request! I'm going to try to post it every morning, but I need your help! If you ever happen to check the blog and I haven't posted that day yet, tell me! Text me! call me! Drive over and slap me (please don't)! It can be as short as saying "update blog", and it will remind me to do it.

Thanks to everyone for reading! And for all who skimmed down to here, shame on you! Get back up there and read it proper!

I'm out.

Stars

Writing writing. Trying to find something to write about. With school starting back up, I feel like I should take more time to update this, so here I am.

I wonder what it's like among the stars

Racing through the lights and swinging around mars

With all that beauty and mystery

Lights shining back through history

Did you know that some of the stars you see don't exist anymore? I find that just astounding. Because of how far away the stars are, the light they give off takes a lot of time to reach the earth, perhaps thousands upon thousands of years. This means that many of those stars may no longer exist, and we might not notice it for another hundred years! That also means that we may see more and more stars as time passes, because some stars may be so far away that the light still hasn't reached us.

It's a simple thing, but something that makes me wonder at God's creation. He made the universe greater than even the brightest minds of our race put together can understand. 

P.S. Random tidbit I found while checking my facts: The light from the sun is approx 8.3 minutes old when it reaches us. So we are actually seeing the sun as it was 8.3 minutes in the past. Craziness!

Can't Hold A Candle

I haven't really been in a blogging mood lately. Life has just been a whirlwind of stress. Work has been the biggest chunk of my time. I work at a non-profit organization called Residential Services Inc, or RSI. They help support and take care of people with mental disabilities. They atmosphere there is just incredible, with so many amazing, kind, and helpful people. Even though I'm "the intern" people respect me and take time to get to know me. What I do officially is IT work, computer repair and desktop support, but really I just do what people need me to do. I've learned so much, and had a good time doing it, though it's certainly tiring. It's satisfying work, and good pay. I could really ask for more.

Over the past two weeks, my family has been remodeling the basement in our house, which meant that I've been displaced from my desk for awhile. It's amazing how comfortable you get in one spot when it's "yours". I've actually been a bit stressed out from having to move. There's not really anywhere for me to go except my room, which just ends up feeling to isolated. Thankfully, it's to the point where it's organized and able to be used, so I have my desk back now. It looks so much better than it used to also, so that's a nice plus.

Finally, I've been dealing with a lot of personal stuff. I've taken some time to step back and examine my life and see what direction I'm going in. I haven't thought a ton about what my options are in the past year, and a lot of the things I've taken for granted I had to reevaluated. It wasn't exactly fun, but it was a good thing for me to do and I think I'll be better off for it.

Well, that's my rant for the day. Hopefully someone still reads this. =)